Substack: 1 to 1,000 subscribers

A standing ovation for those early cheerleaders that fuel our creativity.

Sep 01, 2024

Why your first reader is the most important

In my case, my first avid reader was my sister, Emma.

The first iteration of ‘Off on a Tangent’ was started in about 1989 and was entitled ‘Dear Em’… to accurately reflect my audience of one, my sister.

Mock-up of ‘Off on a Tangent’ Version 1.0, circa. 1989.

The historians and Wham! fans amongst you will have noticed a serious lack of personal computers and the internet back then, so mocking up a pretend magazine article was one helluva process.

Unlike today where you can pretty much create a beautiful A4 newsletter in Canva, on your iPad, whilst having a shit, it was a very different beast back in the 90’s.

Luckily I was a typesetter and so had access to Linotype’s finest kit and was able to do this after hours at my office, on my hi-tech CRTronic 360 Terminal (pictured below), isn’t she a beauty!?

Nothing says ‘cutting edge technology’ quite like a 6” screen and a brown and beige colour scheme.

Please take a moment to appreciate that someone ‘designed’ that keyboard.

Just… wow.

The ‘type’ was coded into position, and then transferred via a floppy disc to the giant typesetting machine (imagine an oversized dishwasher shape costing over £100k) to ‘set it’ onto photographic bromide paper, which then needed to be run through the Processor to develop it.

I could then take a photocopy of it, put it in an envelope and post it off to my one reader.

The subject matter was just as varied as it is today, and my sole purpose of this ‘newsletter for one’ wasn’t to update her on any actual news of what I’d been up to, it was simply to try and make her laugh by telling a story of something that had happened to me (like a trip to a restaurant, AA Gill style) or perhaps an observation (sounding off like Jeremy Clarkson).

The Sunday Times provided all my literary heroes back then… as Carrie Bradshaw didn’t click-clack into my life until 1998.

There was no ‘publishing schedule’ I would just write one as and when an idea popped into my head, they could be weeks or months apart.

I liked to think, without any official announcement of its dispatch, they would be a lovely surprise for Em to receive, when they did eventually descend onto her doormat, in all their analogue glory!

My excitement and enjoyment of posting off a fresh ‘issue’ was followed by an agonising wait… for her to receive it a few days later… and then hopefully give me some encouraging feedback, so the whole messy business would be repeated.

And feedback she did! 👏

Usually in the form of a phone call, to the landline (we didn’t have texting or email back then you know dear), and of course, I had to be in to take said phonecall, which delayed the all-important feedback yet further.

However, it was worth the wait!

Emma, would always lavish high praise on my efforts, reading back the odd phrase to me that made her laugh, and always shout ‘More! More! More!’ at the end of the conversation to encourage me to do another one.

I often wonder if she had just said ‘hmm, it was alright… have you thought about crochet?’ after the first one, would I have bothered to do another? Probably not.

Very recently Emma and I were reminiscing about those old ‘columns’ and the only one we could both remember was entitled ‘Pies Are Cubed’, which was ‘a hilarious tale’ of me making a mess of baking a pie, involving diced beef.

An outrageously clever headline I think you’ll agree!

Those carnivorous, pastry loving mathematicians will be rolling in the aisles!

Worth noting, that these were very much my pre-marketing days, I had no concept of ‘writing for an audience’ back then, which, let’s face it, could not have been simpler given the exact size of my audience was one, and I knew her pretty well.

I’m sure at no point in her life would Emma describe herself as a geometry geek, and by that stage she was probably a vegetarian too.

But I didn’t let trifling details like those put me off great headline copy, and plowed on undaunted, because I found it funny, and thankfully so did she.

The Grayshott Grapevine

My next step into self-publishing was faux newspaper mock-ups. Again driven largely by the fact that I was a typesetter and could produce them, after office hours on the work kit.

I lived in a village called Grayshott at that time and enjoyed amusing the locals with sporadic editions of the Grayshott Grapevine, mocked up like a Daily Mail newspaper cover, and photocopied onto A3 paper for startling realism!

Unlike Lady Whistledown, my intention was never to cause offence or scandal, the stories usually featured my flat mates, friends or the pub staff, always in jest, never unkind, just very silly really, and people enjoyed them.

There’s a massive buzz to be had when you hear a chuckle escape from someone reading your words, it’s a feeling I still crave.

One edition made it onto the dizzying heights of the pub’s staff notice board for a while, as the landlord particularly enjoyed my ludicrously elaborate coverage of their latest refurbishment. 😂

I then started producing these faux newspaper covers as birthday presents for friends, and then friends of friends, tailoring them to the recipient, so they had their own framed, unique cover, like the Seldon Spectator, or Gazza’s Gazette.

I was pretty good at writing amusing copy to the vaguest of briefs:

‘She likes pottery, is an insurance underwriter and has a ginger cat’, would usually suffice… my imagination would fill in the gaps and muster up 2-3 wildly unlikely stories and some fake adverts to accompany them.

They went down a storm!

Then life happened and I needed to focus on the more urgent need to make money and support myself (and later my son) rather than dick around trying to amuse and delight people with my written words.

At no point did I entertain the notion of actually being a journalist or writer… it seemed like a very unobtainable thing, that other people did, not me.

From 1 to 1,000 readers

So when I stumbled upon Substack at the same time in my life when I actually had time on my hands, I just couldn’t help but have another little go at this, and so ‘Off on a Tangent’ was created for mine and your amusement.

This week it surpassed the much coveted 1,000 subscriber mark, which does seem quite surreal to be honest! 🎉

This image came from this handy website which visualises crowd sizes.

Apparently this is what you all look like collectively, that’s quite a crowd! 😳

It is genuinely incredible to think that my ‘audience’ has grown this big in just nine months of writing on Substack.

The odd thing is, it’s making me look more towards that first reader than the 1,000th.

Without their early encouragement I’m not sure I would have given it a proper go.

It’s a scary thing to write your first piece and actually show it to someone, bracing yourself for the inevitable feedback.

I know a lot of you are still in pre-Substack mode, not having taken that first exploratory step.

For those that have, I applaud you and suggest that maybe you too reflect on who it was that first gave you the confidence to try it out ‘for realsies’.

And finally…

I’d like to extend a monumentally HUGE thank you to my very first reader,

Emma Valler

for encouraging me in those early days. Love you so much! 😘

Quite unbelievably, Em, you are now standing in front of 1,000+ other people, who just by being here, and occasionally adding to the Comments, are also egging me on.

I’m getting a huge kick out of realising my dream here and I hope you’re getting a giggle at the very least.

Thank you so muchly! 👏

K8x

Join in the comments below:

Who first encouraged you to take a risk and do whatever it is you’re doing now?
What is holding you back from starting?
Was your first work computer the size of a convection oven?