One for ‘Love Actually’ please
Two single tickets, twenty years apart.
Have you ever felt déja vu, served up as festive time-travel, teamed with a fairy tale ending?
I have, it happened last Sunday.
A bit of background…
A couple of months ago, Substack UK’s
came up with the idea of a year-end group outing to a screening of the festive film Love Actually, accompanied by a full orchestra playing the score.I always jump at the chance of a Substack meet-up, as everyone is lovely and interesting, without exception.
What a merry bunch we were at the pre-show riverside meet-up!
Like many of you I’m sure, Love Actually is my favourite Christmas film and so I needed little persuasion to bag myself a ticket and join them.
The onus was on us to book our show tickets separately, and aim for the Upper Circle so we’d all be roughly together for a spot of intermission chitchat.
A few people who I’d met at previous Substack meet-ups were also going, so our DM’s filled up with phrases like ‘Ticket secured! I’m only nine rows and half a block behind you! Result!’.
It was only when selecting my ticket-for-one, (satisfyingly plugging a single-seat hole in the front row of an otherwise fully booked Block 2), that I realised this was in fact the second time I had purchased just one ticket for this film.
On the day, as I eased into my single seat, sunk back and let the orchestra take me on the over-familiar journey of the nine love stories within the film, it was actually my own story that I couldn’t help but revisit instead.
20 years earlier…
It was a Sunday evening, I needed to get out of the house for a few hours and on this occasion, none of my friends were available to listen to me bang on about the demise of my nine year relationship, and how scary I thought the prospect of being a single parent was.
If things were verging on impossible now, how on earth was I going to cope with twice the responsibility and half the man-power!?!?
‘The End’ had felt like a long time coming, we had struggled for the past year to hold it together, but despite our (and our Couples Counsellor’s) best efforts we had to admit defeat and throw in the towel.
The final furlong for us involved a bout of ‘shift parenting’ as we divided the week up into sections which dictated who’s responsibility the child care was on which day, so we could try and avoid each other where possible… as we counted down the days until my house was ready for me and my son to move back into.
It was a Sunday night, my ‘evening off’ any parental responsibility and I didn’t have anywhere to be or anyone to see.
Where can you go on your own of an evening without feeling like a total loser, or like you’ve been stood up?
The cinema!
Brilliant! I could sit there on my own scoffing popcorn to my heart’s content while watching a ‘no compromise’ film choice. Perfect.
I walked down to the cinema, took a look at what was on offer, approached the ticket counter and said:
“One for Love Actually please.”
I hadn’t realised what a pitiful little phrase that was until it had already left my lips.
One for love, actually, please.
Not the stressful shit show that I had been living for the last few months.
The Box Office guy looked at my glassy eyes and handed me the ticket in silence.
Well done mate, you were clearly paying attention to your customer service training when they covered the bit about ‘not engaging with anyone who looked emotionally unstable’.
“I wonder what he must think of me?” murmured my 35-year-old inner monologue… because back in those days she gave a shit what other people thought.
“He must think I’m totally tragic. Who goes to see a romcom by themselves???” she reasoned whilst selecting one of those single seats at the back, usually flanked by wheelchairs.
In for a penny, in for a pound, I thought, whilst luxuriating in both arm rests.
I then proceeded to cry my way through the film.
Which, as you will all know, is a perfectly socially acceptable way to watch Love Actually.
Through a mist of tears, punctuated by tissue dabbing and sniffles.
I’m sure half the cinema were doing exactly the same (and the other half were putting some serious effort in not to), as each heart-wrenching detail of all the sub-plots unfolded.
Back to 2024
However, twenty years later and the circumstances which led to my second single ticket purchase could not be more different.
I am in a good place with my life, happily married and living my Carrie Bradshaw dream of writing my own column… albeit to a small (but growing) audience for my own publication.
A massive thanks to
for organising the event, and those readers and writers who came along and made it such a special day out: , , , , , , , , , , , ,
And on to 2025
Those of you paying attention will know this also marks the end of my ‘Gap Year’, but fear not, I have already called a General Meeting with myself and we’ve agreed to extend it by at least one more year, if not more!
A massive thank you to all my subscribers, both free and paid, who give me the encouragement to keep writing these posts.
Loving your comments and feedback, please keep ’em coming in 2025!
And finally, in stark contrast to my previous business which was all about the Christmas trading period, I am going to take a break from posting until the New Year to give myself time to reflect, regroup and make Off On a Tangent even bigger and better next year.
Those thoughtful tech bunnies at Substack have provided us with a Pause button, so we can pause paid subscriptions at any time and resume at any time.
What a treat! Imagine being able to do that in a traditional business?!
So my paid VIP’s, who I’m super grateful to as you give me a glimmer of hope that I might just be able to eek this out for a third ‘gap year’, won’t be losing out at all, the paused time will just be added to the end of your annual subscription, or if on monthly payments, the next one won’t be taken until I’ve switch it all back on.
Current plan is the second week of January, at which point I will spring this all back into action and hopefully amuse and delight you with many more posts in 2025!
I sincerely hope you all have an amazing Christmas and a very Happy New Year!
K8x
PS: If any of you are staring down the barrel of an impending divorce/break-up, please take heart and know that even though it all feels like the end of the world right now, things will get better. So dig deep, keep going and if you need a cinema buddy in the Guildford area on a Sunday night, you know where I am.
Join in the comments below:
Have you ever, or do you often go to the cinema on your own?
Which is your favourite sub-plot of Love Actually?
Thank you for being here, please ❤️ (below) if you enjoyed this piece, it really helps others find it.
Thanks for sharing Kate, sobbing your way through love actually feels very fitting. Hope the second trip was more fun - it looks it! Hope you have a lovely Christmas and see you in the new year x
Ah Kate, thanks for sharing. It was a jollier trip this time around wasn't it. Enjoy your Christmas break.